<—- That’s Jonah Falcon. Apparently, he has the world’s largest penis (9 inches flaccid, 13.5 inches erect) and the TSA just had to see the thing for themselves:
“One of the guards asked if my pockets were empty and I said, ‘Yes.’”
Falcon said he knew that his interview was about to get a lot more personal when he was led through one of the X-ray body scanners and passed a metal detector.
“Another guard stopped me and asked me if I had some sort of growth,” Falcon said, laughing.
As he passed through airport security, Falcon said a younger security guard felt threatened by his “very noticeable” package — and interpreted it as a biological threat.
“I said, ‘It’s my dick,’” Falcon said. “He gave me a pat down but made sure to go around [my penis] with his hands. They even put some powder on my pants, probably a test for explosives. I found it amusing.”
The screener gave up the extensive search without so much as a blush or a smile. Falcon made his flight back to New York on time.
But he learned something that day. The hardened traveler has a new game plan for airport security.
“I’m just gonna wear bike shorts from now on,” Falcon said. “That way, they’ll know. You’d think the San Francisco TSA would have had experience with hung guys before, but I guess not.”
Maybe they ought to issue him a special passport?